Author Topic: London Lawyers  (Read 2526 times)

Offline Snibbor

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London Lawyers
« on: September 04, 2013, 07:49:03 PM »
A smart arse London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a
Glasgow copper.

He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer from
LONDON and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock
cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the
Glasgow cops expense!!

Glasgow cop says, " Licence and registration, please."

London Lawyer says, "What for?"

Glasgow cop says, "Ye didnae come to a complete stop at the stop sign."

London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."

Glasgow cop says, "Ye still didnae come to a complete stop. Licence
and registration, please"

London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"

Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, ye huvte come to complete stop,
that's the law, Licence and registration, please!"

London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between
slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration and you
give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."

Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."

The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.

The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the living sh*t
out of the lawyer and says, "Dae ye want me to stop, or just slow doon?"

Offline julianop

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Re: London Lawyers
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2013, 11:58:35 PM »
Excellent!

So, the winter will be among us soon - well, for us hardy northerners, at least - and sitting down with a generous glass of single malt, a big ol' dog and a good book is a good way of passing a cold, slippery evening.

If you've a taste for more things Scottish - and more specifically, Highland - the "Death of a ..." series of books by M. C. Beaton featuring the village bobby Hamish Macbeth will keep you sitting up many late, night chuckling happily...

"In the Scottish Highlands remote fictional village of Lochdubh, in the real county of Sutherland, tall thin constable Hamish Macbeth solves murders. Although Lochdubh and the neighbouring Strathbane are fictional, other places are real. "

http://www.goodreads.com/series/51878-hamish-macbeth

(by the way that village name is pronounced "Loch Doo").

I like to listen to the audio books when I ride/drive my weekly commute between MN and IL.
Julian.
Elk River, MN.
Seasonal Temporal Navigational Disorder - that inexplicable but wholly satisfying affliction that causes one to lose the ability to drive a motorcycle straight home after work in the summer months, despite the apparent ability to make the reverse journey that same morning.

Offline Conrad

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Re: London Lawyers
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2013, 04:53:21 AM »
 :rotflmao:
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Offline BackInTheSaddle

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Re: London Lawyers
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2013, 07:01:17 AM »
 :chugbeer:
Don, Apple Valley, MN
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Previous bikes 2001 Kawi C10 (RIP), and 1981 Honda CB650
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Offline VirginiaJim

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Re: London Lawyers
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2013, 08:21:44 PM »
Excellent!

So, the winter will be among us soon - well, for us hardy northerners, at least - and sitting down with a generous glass of single malt, a big ol' dog and a good book is a good way of passing a cold, slippery evening.

If you've a taste for more things Scottish - and more specifically, Highland - the "Death of a ..." series of books by M. C. Beaton featuring the village bobby Hamish Macbeth will keep you sitting up many late, night chuckling happily...

"In the Scottish Highlands remote fictional village of Lochdubh, in the real county of Sutherland, tall thin constable Hamish Macbeth solves murders. Although Lochdubh and the neighbouring Strathbane are fictional, other places are real. "

http://www.goodreads.com/series/51878-hamish-macbeth

(by the way that village name is pronounced "Loch Doo").

I like to listen to the audio books when I ride/drive my weekly commute between MN and IL.

 :censored: , more stuff for my Kindle....  'Death of a Gossip' is the first one in the series...   :finger_fing11:
"LOCTITE®"  The original thread locker...  #11  2020 Indian Roadmaster, ABS, Cruise control, heated grips and seats/w/AC 46 Monitoring with cutting edge technology U.N.I.T is Back! Member in good standing with the Knights of MEH.

Offline julianop

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Re: London Lawyers
« Reply #5 on: October 14, 2013, 08:56:11 PM »
Yup!

I listen to the audio versions when I'm driving/riding. Some of them are read by Graham Malcolm, and some by Davina Porter. I can listen to his voice on the bike - it's stronger and more appropriate for Hamish adn the other male characters - but hers isn't intelligible above the noise, and in my opinion just doesn't sound right. I am bothered by female narrators trying to sound male; it's comical and distracting. Her highland accent isn't good either.
Julian.
Elk River, MN.
Seasonal Temporal Navigational Disorder - that inexplicable but wholly satisfying affliction that causes one to lose the ability to drive a motorcycle straight home after work in the summer months, despite the apparent ability to make the reverse journey that same morning.