Kawasaki Concours Forum
Mish mash => Funny Pages => Topic started by: Conrad on March 07, 2013, 09:26:43 AM
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Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog.
I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had an elephant?
So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
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:rotflmao:
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+1 = funny
I will have to try that at Sam's Club sometime...
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I thought your dog's name was Bosco and you aren't going to retire until sometime next year or the year after... I'm confused.
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I thought your dog's name was Bosco and you aren't going to retire until sometime next year or the year after... I'm confused.
Easy there Jim, easy now. Take a couple of deep breaths, feel better now? That was a joke and it wasn't about me. Ok?
As for retirement? Less than 8 months away for me now. :D
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Nevermind... ;)
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Omg, that was funny... :rotflmao: