Author Topic: The old rancher  (Read 1665 times)

Offline Conrad

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The old rancher
« on: December 10, 2012, 08:17:32 AM »
The banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty-year old rancher, in town.
Tom had lost his wife a year or so before and rumor had it that he was marrying a 'mail order' bride.

Being a good friend, the banker asked Tom if the rumor was true.

Tom assured him that it was. The banker then asked Tom the age of his new bride to be.

Tom proudly said, 'She'll be twenty-one in November.'

Now the banker, being the wise man that he was, could see that the sexual appetite of a young woman could not be satisfied by an eighty-year- old man.

Wanting his old friend's remaining years to be happy the banker tactfully suggested that Tom should consider getting a hired hand to help him out on the ranch, knowing nature would take its own course.

Tom thought this was a good idea and said he would look for one that afternoon.

About four months later, the banker ran into Tom in town again.

'How's the new wife?', asked the banker.

Tom proudly said, 'Good - she's pregnant.'

The banker, happy that his sage advice had worked out, continued, 'And how's the hired hand?'

Without hesitating, Tom said, 'She's pregnant too.'

Don't ever underestimate us old guys.
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"Don't bother me with facts, Son. I've already made up my mind." -Foghorn Leghorn

Offline wahrsuul

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More old guys...
« Reply #1 on: December 10, 2012, 10:19:04 AM »
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening
with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking
for a special ring for his girlfriend.

The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and
showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want
something very special."

At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought
another ring over "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler
said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with
excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."

The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated by
check. " I know you need to make sure the check is good, so I'll write now
and you can call the bank on Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the
ring up Monday afternoon," he said.

Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no
money in that account."

"I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?"
1999 C-10: Knee savers, Givi trunk, Rifle windshield, KB risers, K&N...and counting...

What did I do to deserve this life?  And how do I do it again?

Offline jim_de_hunter

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Re: The old rancher
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2012, 07:49:15 PM »
The old farmer took two buckets down to the pond to fill them with water when he discovered several young ladies skinny dipping in the pond.

"We're not getting out of this pond until you leave, old man.", one of the ladies yelled at him.

"Don't mind me," he yelled back as he raised the buckets, " I'm just here to feed the alligators!"


2006 ZG1000 "The Blue Monster"