Today my ankle was bothering me so I went to the medicine cabinet (in my wife and I's master bathroom) to grab a Mobic (anti-inflammatory) and also checked to see how full my bottle of Vicodin was.  And to my surprise the whole bottle of Vicodin was gone.  I called my wife since she was at the grocery store and when she got home she did a quick inventory of her various meds.  After going through all of the bottles my wife found that she was missing a BIG bottle of Tramadol and Percoset.  Now I am fuming, my wife and I keep our meds in a spot where none of our children or the kids that my wife babysits can get to them (since they can't get into our bedroom).  My wife has a friend that comes over to watch the kids if my wife has a Dr's appointment and it just so happens that she just "quit" her job at a local veterinarian's office. She is the only person that my wife or I can think of that has had access to where the meds are kept without us being around.  I am going to go by and talk to the Vet and see if there were any other issues and if she quit or was actually fired like I suspect. How should I handle this?  I am thinking about setting up a camera to catch her red handed, if that happens then I will get the police involved.  But I really don't trust her enough to even give her the chance to steal from us again.   I am thinking about just telling her she isn't welcome in our home anymore, but I know it will be hard since they live next door.  Thoughts?

Wow, that's a tough one Jeremy.

How is it that the kids can't get into your bedroom but the friend can?

Unless you know the vet, I'd be surprised if he gave you any info on the details of the woman history of employment with him. That could open him up for a lawsuit.

If you accuse her and it's not her that wouldn't be good at all, especially with her living next to you. Plus you wouldn't catch the thief anyway.

I'd bait a trap for her and use a hidden camera.

+1, that's what I would do.

Wow, that's a tough one Jeremy.

How is it that the kids can't get into your bedroom but the friend can?

Unless you know the vet, I'd be surprised if he gave you any info on the details of the woman history of employment with him. That could open him up for a lawsuit.

If you accuse her and it's not her that wouldn't be good at all, especially with her living next to you. Plus you wouldn't catch the thief anyway.

I'd bait a trap for her and use a hidden camera.

Your best option is to say nothing to her directly as you have absolutely no proof of anything and this is your wife's friend. Now with that said you could find a way of saying that someone has been stealing meds from your home to her. Learn a lesson from this and keep these type of meds under lock and key.

My solution. She lives next door...you can not star a war with a drug addict. You call the friend over for coffee and express your horror that the drugs are missing and you suspect it might be another friend or relative with older kids. Tell her you have already set up a camera but haven't had time to review the tapes and would she watch the kids downstairs while you are upstairs reviewing it.  When you come down be really frustrated and annoy and then annouce the camera was pointed to high up. Let her know that there will be a camera on the cabinet. Go to walmart and get a lock box and put your drugs in it and place it in your closet.  Change you locks if she has a key. When hers does not work she will get the point. Just a thought but it might save a peacful neighborhood and give you a chance to distance yourself from an unpredictable addict.

Camera Cops Jail

Bait her with M&M's in the bottles  I think she will stop help your wife watch the kids and no words will have to be spoken

I would start with a camera and sugar pills. she is a friend / neighbor the vet will most likely not tell u anything for fear of Lawyers
at this point you are not 100% sure what has taken place. except that pills are missing. you are not 100% sure who took them.
I would do like has been mentioned
camera
cops
jail

I would not accuse her till I was sure

Camera Cops Jail

+1

Get proof first then you have the law on your side...otherwise you don't trust a person you can't be 100% sure is guilty and you will never have the same relationship.. just think about if it was someone else and you were falsely accused.  If it is indeed her then you know for sure and so do the police.

... a few sugar pills, and a note perhaps... "I'm on to your thieving ways, scumbag!"  see how she reacts when you come back from your errand... 

My Vicodin is getting low but it's still there...

Whoever took the pills is a thief. I can't abide a thief.

I know the ramifications if I were to mistakenly accuse her, I was just pissed off earlier.  I am attacking this problem with a level head. 

I went and talked to the Vet who confirmed my suspicions that she got fired instead of "quitting".  It was a very good conversation that helped me realize a couple things.  I will let it be for now, but will take better precautions with securing our medication.  A camera is going up along with a note in the medicine cabinet.  So much for trusting a "friend".

Get proof first before proceeding or saying anything. Be cautious of other valuables & $$ left out.

A thief will lie.
A liar will usually steal.
Secure EVERYTHING for if an addict can't steal what they want, they will steal something ELSE to buy it.

She needs to be gone from your life. If you want help her, do it elsewhere. If the kids ask where she went, tell them what they can understand at this point if they are not old enough for all of it.

My wife had a cousin like that.  Everyone used to be on edge when she came to visit as things (medicines and the like) would turn up missing.

... a few sugar pills,

You guys are too kind.

Refill the bottle with a POWERFUL laxative.   

And the camera, etc. is a great idea, too.

Jeremy - 6 years working in a prison taught me a few things. 1) don't confront her til you have proof; 2)if she'll steal your drugs, she'll steal your money and stuff - and WORSE she'll tell those who she knows what stuff you have, and it'll be stolen by them, when she has an alibi.
Personally, I'd set up a motion camera and catch her. In fact I'd let her steal actual pills. Once you have the proof you MUST go to the cops. Otherwise if you try to handle it "in-house" you're still at risk of "an inside job". Once the police are involved, that'll put enough of a scare to hopefully cross you off the "steal here" list. Also, without some serious intervention, she's gonna keep up the same behavior, and spiral downward. think about it, you didn't do anything wrong, she did. HTH, steve

Refill the bottle with a POWERFUL laxative.   

 

I would not trust her with the kids, obviously not a stable person. Be careful J.