Jim I sure wasn't questioning your reason, I was feeling very down yesterday and I needed all the help I received. I was trying to paint a visual to help others understand why a home isn't an option for Pappy. He was led to believe that a recovery home after his bypass would be the best thing for him. He hated every moment he was there, we did far more for him than the home did. He demanded to be released but was told by law he couldnt leave without a DRs consent. I told them that we were leaving, with or without the DRs orders. The only thing that would have stopped us was a pair of LEOs blocking our way. They saw that we were indeed leaving, made a few hurried calls and whadaya know, he was released, but only after I had to sign a bunch of release of liability forms. All he could say was just how bad everyone looked and how lifeless they all looked. He made it quite clear he never wanted to ever be in one of those places again. I have thought about our local VA old folks home for during the day, but ever since we discovered the visiting angels we have a very good working solution, we are doing 2 hours a day M-F to see how it works out, so far so good, we have had one of the lady let go, she seemed to think lunch and social events were her duties, in between her calls and many texts. His primary angel is the mom of a submariner who is based at the Bangor Sub base, she is from Arkansas and is proving to be one heck of a care giver. Once I am cleared to return to work we will probably bump the hours up to 4 hours a day until nicer/clearer weather arrives. If he were at a stage where he was dangerous to others I don't know what I would do, he sees myself and my buddy Rich as his authority figure, he takes a no just like I did when I was a kid. He will defy my brother, my son, and my wife. So, I end up doing a bunch of things that others could do. I am starting to see a little paranoia, not toward me or Rich, but to the others. I see a time when I will need to move him into my house for his own safety, that is going to be tough as he will always feel a need to go to his house, a problem we had when he was recovering from his bypass. He would wake up at some weird hour and just go home...
Ugd56, we have ended up with a fairly complex yet simple method for his meds, we broke them into two categories, AM and PM, we control his meds and keep them at our home, his AM he gets at breakfast time and PMs are here when we make him dinner. I feel fortunate that he hasn't become combative, I think it is because I am a daily figure and I live next door. Tonight was about as close as it gets, he had a cheap pen come apart, he lost the spring and he had a small stepped plastic gear in his hand. In his mind he broke it and I needed to fix it. I found him a much better pen and put the broke one up, we went downstairs to stoke the fire for the night he kept insisting he dropped the spring somewhere on the floor. I'd bet money he is still worried about that spring.
Heres an idea, do y'all think a thread about Alzheimers would be beneficial to the forum? I know how much help and comfort I have received and I think others may benefit. Sometimes knowing others out there are experiencing the same pains it helps, and it would be a great place to share what has worked and places to seek professional help. Let me know and I'll see about putting something together.
Chet
