Did everything as instructed and the only difference being, which I think is a positive is I held my fob up to switch and now the bike truly wakes up when I push down. The dash lights and the stove knob insignia mocks me
Ah, so your active fob battery is probably dead. So replace that first
but still zero movement. I guess my fob battery is dead......
You used your active fob as a passive one by holding it directly on the "special spot", and the bike wakes, so that means the switch is NOT stuck (or at least it isn't anymore). At that point, you should be able to turn the key. If not, you had/have more than one problem at the same time.
Now I am stumped. There should be a solenoid that activates when the bike wakes up, that is what allows the key to turn. Perhaps that is also not activating- which could be physical or electrical. If there is enough power for the computer to wake and turn the dash on, it should be enough power to also trigger the solenoid. When the bike wakes from pushing the knob down, does it stay on for several seconds, or die almost immediately after waking?
And this is a stupid question, but I don't think the key will turn when it is depressed- you aren't trying to turn it while it is pushed down, are you? Press, wake, release, turn. Sorry, have to ask, not meant to be insulting. The stranger the problem, the stranger the questions