A double mocha "crappachino" with a twist please

[Rhino]

Wonder what an elephant coming off a good coffee buzz does??
Or once they get the beast "hooked" on the caffeine, how do you retire him?
Remember, an elephant never forgets, so they say.

  Some of the caffein must be getting into the elephants system.

[B.D.F.]

I can just imagine trying to explain exactly what a person does to "harvest" the beans. Maybe something like this:

"Well, I gather coffee beans for the roasting and exporting company."

"Oh, so you pick bean off the trees?"

"Well, not exactly, by the time I get to them they have been picked already and the..... ah..... first step of......ah..... processing is already done."

Brian (trying to get THAT mental image out of my mind)

There's going to be a LOT of grumpy elephants waiting for their coffee in the mornings!

[rocknrod]

I know - I just can't imagine how they thought of doing this.

[Conrad]

I know - I just can't imagine how they thought of doing this.

You know, regular coffee just isn't 'doing it' for me any longer. I wonder how I can get more of a kick outta my beans. Hmmm, are those coffee beans in that pile of **** under that tree? Hey, I have an idea...



 

[Rhino]

You know, regular coffee just isn't 'doing it' for me any longer. I wonder how I can get more of a kick outta my beans. Hmmm, are those coffee beans in that pile of **** under that tree? Hey, I have an idea...

+1 I've seen lots of things, like this, that I just can't understand the logic of how they came about. I was in line at an airline in Boston airport in the 80's and a guy was wearing navy blue pants with little lime green whales all over them. I couldn't for the life of me understand how that could have happened.

Cloth manufacture:   "hey, lets make some navy blue cloth with lime green whales"
Pants manufacture:   "hey, lets buy that cloth and make pants from it"
Wholesale co:           "hey, lets buy those pants cuz I'm sure we'll sell a million of them"
Retail outlet:            "hey, I can't think of anything better to put on our shelves"
Customer:                "hey, I need new pants and these are just the ticket"

What are the odds of all of those happening?

[B.D.F.]

I live in southern New England and there is lots 'o stuff at the edge and in the water that 1) I am amazed people eat and 2) have always wondered how 'they' found out such a thing was even edible? I can see it now- "Hey Trog, try breaking one of those oval rocks (a quahog) and eating the innards- I dare 'ya!" Oysters, mussels, crabs, lobsters ('bugs' as I like to call them)... who tried them first? I mentioned this to a friend one time and he answered immediately- a starving man found out you can eat that stuff. I guess watching the seagulls eat all of that stuff at least showed it was some form of food.

Maybe the coffee bean / dung thingy came about from people who normally eat dung and found a particularly tasty batch one day? Say Trog, this dung gooder than that dung over there! Make me want run fast and catch antelope!

:-)

Brian

You know, regular coffee just isn't 'doing it' for me any longer. I wonder how I can get more of a kick outta my beans. Hmmm, are those coffee beans in that pile of **** under that tree? Hey, I have an idea...



 

[B.D.F.]

I can see that happening if you add alcohol and or opiates to a few sections of your outline.

Brian

+1 I've seen lots of things, like this, that I just can't understand the logic of how they came about. I was in line at an airline in Boston airport in the 80's and a guy was wearing navy blue pants with little lime green whales all over them. I couldn't for the life of me understand how that could have happened.

Cloth manufacture:   "hey, lets make some navy blue cloth with lime green whales"
Pants manufacture:   "hey, lets buy that cloth and make pants from it"
Wholesale co:           "hey, lets buy those pants cuz I'm sure we'll sell a million of them"
Retail outlet:            "hey, I can't think of anything better to put on our shelves"
Customer:                "hey, I need new pants and these are just the ticket"

What are the odds of all of those happening?

[jettawreck]

What about an egg?? Who figured trying the first one of those (whatever the source-chicken, lizard, dino, etc) was a good idea??  

[B.D.F.]

I do not know but I would use the same guess- early man saw lizards / snakes / birds and such eating eggs and decided it would be a great base for a hollandaise sauce... :-)  Or maybe he just ate them raw like Rocky in the movie.

Brian

What about an egg?? Who figured trying the first one of those (whatever the source-chicken, lizard, dino, etc) was a good idea??  

[Cuda]

If this great flavor has to do with fermentation you would think you could do it in another way?
I use a Cuisinart automatic grind and brew unit and good old Eight O'Clock nuts I'm happy.
 

[MrPepsi]

I've heard of coffee from monkey $hit but this is the first I've heard of it from elephants. Another example of "The Emperors New Clothes" in action.

Yes, I thought it came from monkeys too.
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/k/kopiluwak.htm

[B.D.F.]

From your link:

<begin quote>
The animal processes the beans and excretes them whole, unscratched, and without dung.

The animal is a palm civet, a dark brown tree-dwelling cat-like creature found throughout Southeast Asia. The scientific name is paradoxurus hermaphroditus.

According to the Manila Coffee House, the palm civet just happens to like to ingest the ripest and reddest coffee beans, which also happen to be the ones best for brewing.  The cat eats the outer covering of the beans in the same way that is accomplished by de-pulping machines.  Something happens to the beans in the journey through the cat's intestines that gives it a flavor that is celebrated by coffee drinkers. 

<end quote>

Now what would be absolutely fantastic is if one could have one of those civets as a pet.... and train it to..... er..... deposit..... the beans into the coffee grinder directly. At the end of a dinner party, one could just whistle up 'Clyde', have him do his stuff ("drop the duce" in civet- coffee speak), and make some of the best, freshest coffee in the world!

I betcha' Strawboss would love to rent such a thing and invite his idiot brother- in- law over.... Jess' sayin'.

 

Brian

Yes, I thought it came from monkeys too.
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/k/kopiluwak.htm

[VirginiaJim]

Again...

[Conrad]

Tusk tusk...

Elephant sized.

[Outback_Jon]

From your link:

The animal processes the beans and excretes them whole, unscratched, and without dung.

The animal is a palm civet, a dark brown tree-dwelling cat-like creature found throughout Southeast Asia. The scientific name is paradoxurus hermaphroditus.

According to the Manila Coffee House, the palm civet just happens to like to ingest the ripest and reddest coffee beans, which also happen to be the ones best for brewing.  The cat eats the outer covering of the beans in the same way that is accomplished by de-pulping machines.  Something happens to the beans in the journey through the cat's intestines that gives it a flavor that is celebrated by coffee drinkers. 

How?  That's got to be propaganda from the coffee snobs. 

[Conrad]

How?  That's got to be propaganda from the coffee snobs.

With proper training of course...   

[B.D.F.]

Hey, it absolutely could be. I personally have never seen or tasted the coffee, seen the beans or the animal they <ahem> come from. ??

I am a firm believer in the concept of 'The king's new clothes (he was nude)' scenario. That is the only thing possible that could explain a lot of humans' behavior. I would not be surprised if the coffee tasted like $*%& myself. 

Brian

How?  That's got to be propaganda from the coffee snobs.

[VirginiaJim]

With proper training of course...   

The snobs or the elephant/civit/monkey/whatever?

[Son of Pappy]

The roasting process "should" kill any bacteria left over   In the spirit of the "Great exhaust test of 2008" I will feed my dog King some raw, unprocessed beans, follow him around until it is processed in the grandest fashion, wash the beans, roast them, and send them to Brian for sampling.  I would but I no longer have the mad powah of KIPASS at my disposal and Brian has that wonderful bypass switch.

[Conrad]

The snobs or the elephant/civit/monkey/whatever?

Yes.